tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post6410586793665672638..comments2023-04-26T04:59:50.900-07:00Comments on Pandaleidoscope: Why Do We Fight It with Everything in Us?PandaMomhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03950252680639174490noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-62758263504576762132013-08-13T10:02:44.109-07:002013-08-13T10:02:44.109-07:00C and I came home from that same wedding reception...C and I came home from that same wedding reception last Saturday and ended up having an intense discussion in the driveway. My sweet 17 year old did not want to talk about marriage with me because, "You and I have different ideas about love." I kept pushing, of course, and ended up crying. It was tough to see that frustrations about love in my own life had built a little wall between us while I wasn't even watching. Eventually, I was able to reinforce the idea that I loved and trusted her, and would equally love and accept anyone that God brought into her life. Your comments captured this divide in our thinking about marriage and love, while emphasizing the necessity of both. Thank you for sharing!Jmomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17906954717046440641noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-42540705979428815302013-08-13T06:56:07.759-07:002013-08-13T06:56:07.759-07:00Yes, I know - PandaMom and Funderstorm will say &q...Yes, I know - PandaMom and Funderstorm will say "Oh, you're not old. You're not there yet." And you would be right. I find myself in that sort of in-between season of life - by no means in the naive honeymoon years, but not yet to a season of looking back over a decade or two of what life has afforded us.<br /><br />I'm thankful that I went into marriage not completely naive of what we might face. Yes, our perspectives were about as long as a ten-foot pole, but a series of events leading up to our wedding day gave us a small taste of the reality that life would not bring all we had dreamed up for ourselves. We've had two categories of friends it seems - those who get to around year 4-5 (if they make it that long) with a heart that screams "This is NOT what I had in mind for our marriage! Did I make a mistake? This is not how it's supposed to be!" and those who look back on the years with a bigger perspective, looking back with fondness but also with gratitude at how much they've grown since. Those who fight with the reality miss the fact that YES! Marriage is NOT what it was designed to be - it's the reality of living in a fallen world, married to a fellow sinner in need of the same grace. Through that lens, we make it through each day - the ones that are sweet, and the ones that are...well, refining. "This is harder than we dreamed, but I believe that's what the Promise is for..."<br /><br />(And while I don't yet have the early signs of wrinkles/aging, I do have the backend that tells me I just can't drink Dr. Peppers quite like I used to. A switch got turned off when I turned 30, and my energy level has been going down ever since. No longer can I live on that diet of sodas and candy...)GloryandGracehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11700428736344317474noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-78940645708299182262013-08-13T06:30:29.754-07:002013-08-13T06:30:29.754-07:00I have a very crass comment about your Monistat, b...I have a very crass comment about your Monistat, but I will save it for in person. And why are you using that anyway, you are HAWT! Recklesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07727270511442104935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-51443444308025225672013-08-13T06:28:27.942-07:002013-08-13T06:28:27.942-07:00Funderstorm, I'm not sure I'll ever take o...Funderstorm, I'm not sure I'll ever take off the lens of idealism, it's part of my hard wiring! But, yes, I absolutely agree. Some people would say if you become too "settled" in your skin (put on a few pounds, don't fight aging tooth and nail, etc...) that you have given up, but I think you've decided to be comfortable with as you say, "the parts we like and the parts we don't." It's okay to age! And it's far better than the alternative! That's one place where it's easy for gratefulness to come in. I get to live another day. Recklesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07727270511442104935noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-10363382574137009342013-08-13T04:18:39.290-07:002013-08-13T04:18:39.290-07:00Thanks for chiming in you two. I know y'all bo...Thanks for chiming in you two. I know y'all both very well. You're beautiful to me no matter what. I'd be happy to share my Monistat with y'all any day. lol. ; )PandaMomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03950252680639174490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-49751870667050938792013-08-12T20:11:04.835-07:002013-08-12T20:11:04.835-07:00Reckless, you are right on the money. Also, our cu...Reckless, you are right on the money. Also, our culture programs (indoctrinates?) us to believe that only young is beautiful. When, like fine wine, age IS the beauty, the best part. It's where we finally become comfortable in our own skin, the parts we like and the parts we don't. We have marinated and all becomes beautiful, perhaps mostly because of the lens we use to see things. We've take off the lenses of expectation and idealism, to look the lens of reality with gratefulness. Would you agree?<br />~FunderstormFunderstormhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04406559808853286895noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3930974220184517677.post-5962767542698462862013-08-12T14:23:48.693-07:002013-08-12T14:23:48.693-07:00I'll bite. I think that aging surprises us. ...I'll bite. I think that aging surprises us. It shouldn't, but it does. I have a picture of myself in my head, and sometimes, the reflection in the mirror does not match. It's not really that I despise what I see in the mirror; it's that my mind is slower to age than my body. There's a strange disconnect. And it takes time for me to adjust the picture in my head to match the reality in the mirror. Which I think is ok and fairly normal.<br /><br />When I was in graduate school, I studied this "suprise in the mirror" phenomenon a little. It continues to happen even as people (not just women, btw...) grow very old (80+). I think it plays out in real life in a useful and meaningful way. We have all known an older person with a young sparkle in his/her eye, and we have all known a young person who seems quite old. We can make a choice to be either.<br /><br />Additionally, I think aging generally makes our definitions of beauty larger and more flexible, but it is doesn't happen overnight. We have to investigate the wrinkle and acknowledge it in order to accept it, no? <br /> Recklesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07727270511442104935noreply@blogger.com